It’s not what happens to us that matters. It’s how we interpret what happens to us that matters. I believe this is the most fundamental principle of human psychology. Life is full of difficult situations. We have little control over what happens to us but a lot of control over how we choose to interpret it.
People are meaning makers. Two people get laid off from the same department with the same pay. One goes into a massive depression because she believes she’ll never find another job this good. The other is disappointed but gets back on the horse, looking for another position because he believes he is very talented and someone will be fortunate to hire him. The way we interpret events impacts how we feel, behave, and think. The quality of our life depends on the quality of our beliefs.
We have the power to interpret any experience either in a negative or positive way. And even if our initial interpretation is negative, we can choose to reframe it in a positive way. When our perceptions change, our world changes. It’s really that simple.
So why is it that sometimes we get stuck in a negative mind set and can’t seem to find a way to reframe the situation? This is because we interpret experience both on a conscious and unconscious level. When we get stuck, it’s most always because there’s an underlying unconscious message we’re telling ourselves that is outside of our awareness. And so, we will remain stuck until we identify the unconscious message and process it. Revealing the unconscious is often difficult to do on our own and often requires the aid of professional help. So if you’ve been feeling stuck for a while and can’t figure out how to move forward, it may be a sign that you need some professional assistance.