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I think it’s a mistake to ever look for hope outside of one’s self…I tried
to die near the end of the war. The same dream returned each night until I
dared not to sleep and grew quite ill. I dreamed I had a child and even in the
dream I saw it was my life, and it was hideous, and I ran away. But it
always crept onto my lap again and clutched at my clothes. Until I thought,
if I could kiss it, whatever in it was my own, perhaps I could sleep. And I
bent to its broken face, and it was horrible…but I kissed it. I think one
must finally take one’s life in one’s arms Arthur Miller

Letting the tears roll down my face
Finally at last allowing myself to feel
the deep feelings that were far too long buried in my heart
Too long to remember
Begging just to be felt
to be heard, to be acknowledged
finally, these long awaited feelings rising to the surface
Allowing myself to feel what was too dangerous to feel
To feel a sense of acceptance with myself and my uniqueness
Allowing everything that’s filling my mind and heart to finally find their place.
To give them a sense of belongingness
to be understood,
to be validated
gaining deep strength and peace
No longer afraid
And now a new feeling envelopes my entire body
that leaves me with a message so clear
To face the hidden truths
And give them life
They are mine. They are me
Becoming me
No greater joy than this

Adapted from an anonymous poem