Here’s a fundamental principle to live a life of joy and serenity:
To consistently feel that I am striving to do the best I can with what I’ve been given to
work with in order to do the most good I can for the world.
There are two important points here. The first is to maintain a focus outside oneself, to
live in a self-transcendent mode by striving to do good in the world. A life of self-
absorption leads to a life of depression and despair. The second is to be fully self-
accepting. I am doing the best I can with my unique combination of strengths and
weaknesses. Who I am, is good enough or as the title from a self-help book from the 70’s
says, “I ain’t much baby, but I’m all I got.” Joy and serenity happen when we
consistently integrate the two attitudes of self-transcendence and self-acceptance.
We destroy joy and serenity when we become self-absorbed, compare ourselves to others,
believing we are defective and not good enough. Then our biggest enemy becomes our
limitations which we come to despise which takes us into the abyss of self-hate. We are
particularly vulnerable to this because of the competitive culture we’re embedded in.
We maximize our growth, when we are in a state of calm not when we put pressure on ourselves. Trees grow naturally in a nurturing environment. Human beings as well grow naturally when they are in a positive state of mind,, not when they are stressing and feeling deficient.