Happiness is not a happening. It’s an ongoing choice. Unfortunately, we tend to live as if
happiness is a happening. We play the “when-then game.” When I get my degree, then
I’ll me happy. When I get married, then I’ll be happy. When all my ducks are aligned,
then I’ll be happy. It’s insidious and relentless. It’s so hard to turn this tape off. And if
we continue to let it play, we will never be happy. I often say to myself, “Dov, are you
going to groan and moan all the way to the grave?”
It takes an act of will to be happy. Life is indeed, tough and painful. I often say to G-d,
“Boy, it’s rough down here.” It’s so easy to obsess about the half of the glass that’s
empty. When-O-when is it ever going to go my way? We push and we fight and we
pressure ourselves which only makes things worse. Will we ever relax and live in reality
without stressing ourselves?
As Hillel said, “If not now when?” We know what we have to do to be happy. We know
we need to appreciate and enjoy the multitude of good we possess. Eyes? vision? color?
No big deal. We are a bit crazy. When will we stop making excuses? We just can’t seem
to see the big picture because the picture in front of us is so intense, so vivid, and so
captivating. It takes a great act of will to be happy. If Christopher Reeves did it as a
quadriplegic, maybe those of us who can walk have a shot.